?

Doesn't want to do anything. He has no determination and no motivation. He doesn't know where to find them. He fed up with the world and god. He is not happy. He has plans but he doesn't want it. He can do anything if he'd wish. No reason, no taste, no smell, no noise. Only today is important for him as he seems. What will make his like tasty? What can color his life? Life is too harsh. He knows where it ends but he wants something else, new.

Guess

Yesterday, I did one thing that I was planning since 2 months ago. I hope, it carried out very good, but still no response other that complicated emotion.

I really tried hard. And I hope I will crop what I planted, if god really exists.

Thought thief

Reading blog of someone, listening posted songs, feeling her feeling... What am I really doing? Is it legal? I am breaking into someone's world without permission and reading her thoughts...

I think, I absorbed to her blog. I just reading non-stop. Feeling her sadness, happiness, thoughts, songs, traveling through her world....

Is it illegal?

I don't know for sure

I remember that when I was in high school my friend told me to listen Coldplay. I didn't know the band but I liked the song. It was "Yellow." Since that day I became Coldplay's the coldest fan. I love their songs. And now let's jump into another topic.

Yesterday, I tried not to eat meat, which was very successfully carried out. Because maybe I really wanted to change myself. Hell YEAH! I will change myself. But not into bad one but to better one. We don't know ourselves really changed until people say so. Because we are being us so there seem no change and when people see us after long time, they say you are really changed, you are acting like an adult. Maybe it's true. Maybe I become more mature and more silent than I was a child. We change but we still don't feel it.

By the way, I think, I am really effortless guy that never gives up on girls. WHATEVER, I do what I want, who cares what they say. Now I have one shot. If shoot it successfully, there it will go. THE FEELING OF LOVE. I don't really know about that feeling but, I believe, I felt that feeling 2 years ago, maybe yes, maybe no. Whichever the case is I will not give up. I am not sure that I will not give up, but at this moment I feel I will not give up until I die.

Tomorrow will be nice day. I feel it!

First post of the 2012

Sitting front of my laptop and spending days. I think I hate that. I want to go out but I have no reason. To think, if you sit back and just do nothing for few days, you'll be lazy and have no motivation to do anything. It has proven by because I became lazier since the vacation started. I have to do my course work and I have an idea but I have no interest to do that. Maybe eve of the day I might do it. I don't want it, however, there is no help.

All I am doing now is like update some posts in Love page on Facebook which I don't actually like. The reason is people like to criticize, they don't know it for sure but still do it. What the f*** happened to them? Can't they just agree the terms and say thank you? I don't like those who don't know anything but like to criticize what people did. Anyway, I play video games, which, I believe, I am pretty good. I do want to discard it because it consumes my most of the day. I can't still encourage myself, moreover, dedicate myself to one thing.

Even if I have a crush on someone, I just do nothing but buy presents and chat. That is sucks. Maybe I have to change my appearance I mean losing weight or changing my style or act like an adult. I don't know for sure. But I am losing some weight. Therefore, the result will show me good side, I hope.

Finally, I think it's time to change myself. I always think about that but I never really tried or sth, I think, because of my laziness. I know, I can do anything, I believe in myself. I will win the laziness and celebrate my victory with something I really want.